#0047

My toes are curled over the edge.
Founded on the rock beneath me
I slowly try and raise my courage
As I stare at the pool
Imagining the hysteria;

I'll hit the water and it will bite back
As I surface and grasp at the air
Intaking sharply as I am caught
Somewhere between paralysed numbness
And sore distress.

I stand with agonising indetermination.
Perhaps I'll wade in?
Or dip a toe to test it?
Yet, if I do I fear that a true paralysis
Will overtake me and cause me to turn away-
Turning from the blissful cool
Into the heat that is my current devil.

He beckons me.
Despite my fear
I decide to jump.
A leap of faith.
To numbness, distress, or bliss.
Who can tell? Baited breath until the water hits...

#0046

We laugh together and pray together,
We read together and watch together.
We talk of love and of the joy we'll have
Through those who bear the names we give them.
We speak of times that are passed,
Beautiful moments that have yet to come
Yet have every potential of existence;
The mundane and the enthralling.
I sit here in the warmth of my room
Listening to the rain pouring
And laugh at your stubbornness
Wondering how your cold will fare.
And it's in this still moment
After my brief chuckle
Where my heart is suddenly filled
With a fondness I cannot contain.
It's nothing really.
No remarkable insight into you and I.
It's happening at your expense, even!
But, I love you in the stillness.
I love your grim determination
That prevents you from turning back
To seek shelter and help.
I love your dark humour at your own predicament.
I love the care for me that prevents you
From 'putting me out' for a moment;
What an unlikely hero you are.
I embrace the stillness
And allow it to stoke the flames.